


Dysphoria

by skywarpie



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 08:20:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14849141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skywarpie/pseuds/skywarpie
Summary: Starscream's dislike of Windblade has deeper roots than thought.





	Dysphoria

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really bad at summaries, but I promise I tried to make this at least a little entertaining.

Starscream’s optics bore holes into the door Windblade had exited, each passing moment only increasing his annoyance. Of course, he was well aware that without her, having Metroplex up and functioning would have been nearly impossible. Not that he would mention that to anyone. That did not ease his increasing anger upon seeing her every time she delivered said reports, however. Something in the way she presented herself, had his plating constantly tensing. 

“She’s really not that bad, you know.” Obviously, Bumblebee would choose this moment to make himself noticeable once more. “She’s just trying to help. You should give her a chance.” His expression solemn. 

How many times had he heard that spill again? Far too many to count at this point. “Have I not done just that?” Starscream spat back, returning his optics to one of the many data pads littering his desk. After a moment it proved to be useless, seeing as his processor was only willing to focus on one thing. He scoffed, flinging said data pad across the room. 

“Starscream –” Bumblebee’s annoyingly caring voice cut through the air once more. “I think –” The yellow bug cut himself off. Advising Starscream in these sorts of situations always proved to backfire and result in more harm than good. “Maybe you should just go home for the evening. Enjoy a good rest. I’m sure that would solve the problem.” Probably not the best counter argument, but it was worth a shot.

To his surprise Starscream did not yell, instead did the exact opposite, resting his helm on the desktop and looking past Bumblebee. “I don’t need anything. I need…just leave.” After all, it wasn’t as if he could just spew out what his trouble was. Well, he could but he preferred not to. Years of mixed reactions (mostly bad ones) had made their marks, showing that it was best to keep said problem to oneself.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------- 

 

From the moment she had stepped from the assembly line, Slipstream felt an itch under her plating. One she couldn’t quite explain. It would come and go. One moment making itself known, the next disappearing as if it never occurred. One thing was for certain, this body --- something was wrong. It didn’t feel right. Looking upon her peers and fellow seekers, all went about life as if nothing was out of the ordinary.

She had learned to stuff the issue away deep inside her processor. No need in voicing things that couldn’t be fixed. At least until she had finally wormed her way into the academy. From there things only went southward. Being around fellow bots made the problem all too real and it began to eat away at her until finally she could take it no more.

The first reactions had been terrible. Slurs and crude statements tossed her way as she passed, and yet with each day and increasing tension, she held her head high, refusing to let their words destroy what she was making of herself. It wasn’t uncommon for a bot to change their body. Why should it be any different for her.

It started with a repaint, colors more fitting of her personality, then the frame itself. The weld scars would always be noticeable. But what did it matter. All of it had gone well until she had tried to change the pitch of her vocalizer on her own. An idea not completely thought through, one that left her with a “grating voice”, as most had called it. It was still an octave too high, but it would do for the time being.

Eventually she was accepted into the science program and that was were she met him. The first bot not to react negatively. 

“I’m Skyfire.” The shuttle smiled, extending a hand in greeting. “You must be Slipstream.”

“Starscream. My name is Starscream.” She had corrected him without even knowing. And he had smiled with a nod as if understanding. From the budding relationship, her confidence had grown. It became a habit to prove that even a mech originally coded as femme could do everything the same, if not better. 

When he had joined the decepticons, Starscream had finally grasped that long forgotten longing he felt. It lasted for a time but over the years things seemed to dissolve. Even being Second in Command couldn’t push away the ache of wanting to look how he imagined himself. 

The cycle started again. He changed his frame, enjoyed it for a bit, changed it, and repeat. Nothing ever sticking how it truly should have. 

 

\---------------------------------------------------

 

“Starscream.” The autoboots voice jostled him out of the memory. “Are you alright?” Bumblebee wore a concerned expression.

“Perfectly.” He straightened himself once more. 

“You know, if something is bothering you it’s okay to talk to me about it, right?”

A half-hearted chuckle passed the jet’s lips. “Shouldn’t you already know the problem. After all, you’re not really here.”


End file.
